Who Prepares for the Mother?
How I learnt to slow down, nourish myself and embrace postpartum with my third baby
We spend nine months preparing for our babies.
We research prams, pack hospital bags, wash tiny clothes and prepare nurseries. We think about everything our babies might need. But somewhere amongst all that preparation, we often forget about the person about to go through one of life's biggest transformations.
The mother.
Who prepares her? Who makes sure she's nourished, rested, supported and cared for?
As a mama of three and a birth and postpartum doula, this is something incredibly close to my heart. By the time I welcomed my third baby, I knew I wanted to do things differently.
Choosing a slower postpartum
With my third baby, I made a conscious decision to slow down.
Not because life was less busy. Quite the opposite. I had three young children, a household to run and a husband working seven days a week, often missing bedtime three or four nights a week.
There were afternoons juggling dinner, baths, big emotions, a feeding newborn and two older children needing their mama. It wasn't always peaceful cuddles and slow mornings. There were hard days, overwhelming days and moments when everyone needed something at once.
But I realised slowing down wasn't about having a slow life. It was about being intentional with the life I had. We embraced mornings in our pyjamas, more cuddles, fewer commitments and at least one day at home each week without rushing anywhere. We prioritised daily fresh air, even if that meant sitting outside with a coffee. I put my phone down, journalled the little memories and reminded myself of three simple words.
Be here now.
Not because every moment was magical, but because I didn't want to spend this season wishing it away.
Investing in the mother, not just the baby
One of the biggest changes I made was how I chose to spend our money.
It's easy to get caught up buying baby gadgets, beautiful outfits and products we're told we need. But by my third baby, I'd learnt something. Babies need far less than we're led to believe. Mothers often need far more than they're given.
Instead of purchasing non-essential baby items, I consciously invested in my postpartum support. We organised a weekly cleaner to reduce the household load. I booked a 90-minute postpartum massage at home every fortnight. Not as a luxury, but as dedicated time to care for my recovering body.I arranged support with my older children so I could nap, recover and bond with our newborn.
I prioritised nourishing meals, hydration, less screen time and small moments to regulate my nervous system. With my husband working long hours, this support made a genuine difference.
I recognise paid support isn't accessible to everyone. Sometimes it's asking family to bring dinner instead of another baby outfit, accepting help with washing or organising friends to assist with school pickups. It's not about how much you spend. It's about recognising that preparing for the mother matters just as much as preparing for the baby.
Motherhood was never meant to be done alone. Somewhere along the way, we've created an expectation that mothers should do it all. Recover from birth, care for a newborn, manage a household, look after other children and somehow find time for themselves. But mothers were never meant to do this alone. We need people who show up. Who bring food, fold washing, listen without judgement and remind us we're doing enough.
And support shouldn't be something we only seek when we're completely exhausted. It should be something we plan for and welcome from the beginning.
So, who prepares for the mother?
If you're expecting a baby, I encourage you to think beyond the nursery and hospital bag.
Who will nourish you? Who can help around the house? Who will support you emotionally? Who can hold your baby while you rest? And most importantly, how do you want to feel during your postpartum?
This is the heart behind my work at Nurturing You: helping mothers feel seen, heard, held and supported throughout motherhood. Because the dishes can wait, the washing will always be there and the to-do list will never truly be finished. But these moments are fleeting.
Slow down where you can. Accept support. Invest in yourself. Soak up the cuddles. Be here now.
With love,
Reanna Bryant
Mama of three | Birth & Postpartum Doula
Nurturing You – Northern Rivers, NSW
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/nurturing.you_/
