This might be an unpopular option but postpartum isn’t forever. It’s a chapter—a sacred, transformative, and challenging one—but it’s not the rest of your story. Yet, as new mothers, we’re often told otherwise. This perspective, while well-meaning, can make an already overwhelming experience feel insurmountable.

Let’s unpack why this narrative might be unhelpful and what a more supportive outlook could look like instead.

What Does ‘Postpartum Is Forever’ Really Mean?

The saying “Postpartum is Forever” is often thrown around to imply that pregnancy, birth, and becoming a mother result in lifelong changes. And while motherhood undeniably leaves lasting impacts—on our identity, health, and even relationships—that’s not postpartum. That’s matrescence.

Postpartum refers to the specific, sacred period following childbirth. It’s a time marked by hormonal shifts, physical recovery, emotional vulnerability, and the tender process of adjusting to life with a new baby. 

Yes, postpartum has long-lasting impacts—some negative if it’s not properly nurtured—but it’s not forever. And we need to treat it as such.

When we conflate postpartum with the lifelong transformation of matrescence, we lose sight of the importance of nurturing and addressing this vital period. If postpartum is framed as “just how it is now,” it can discourage mothers from seeking the care and support they deserve.

The Lifelong Impact of Matrescence

Becoming a mother leaves no woman as it found her. As Nikki McCahon says, “It unravels and rebuilds her. It cracks her open, takes her to her edges. It’s both beautiful and brutal; often at the same time.”

This is the essence of matrescence: the profound transition from maiden to mother. It’s a transformation that’s physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual—a process that forever changes who we are.

Matrescence can be incredibly confronting, yet it’s also deeply empowering. It’s the journey of reshaping our identity, redefining our priorities, and finding balance and comfort in a new version of ourselves.

And while matrescence is lifelong, the postpartum state—the intense shifts, exhaustion, and hormonal changes—won’t last forever. These early weeks and months are sacred and tender, yes, but they’re also temporary.

Reframing Postpartum as a Chapter, Not Forever

Conversely, postpartum isn’t just 6 weeks either. It’s so much more than the initial recovery phase that many associate with the term. Here’s a different way to think about it:

The First 40 Days: The initial confinement phase is crucial for rest, recovery, and nourishment. This is when mothers need to be mothered and their babies are still in a womb like state.

The Fourth Trimester (3 Months): The cocooning phase allows mothers to ease into their new identity and slowly reemerge in their own time.

6 to 18 Months: True recovery, both physically and emotionally, can take longer. This timeline varies for every mother and depends on factors like birth outcomes, support, nourishment, and rest in those early weeks.

While postpartum depletion can linger for years, acknowledging this is different from saying the intensity of postpartum lasts forever. Understanding these phases helps us see postpartum as a journey—a series of stages that evolve over time.

Why This Reframe Matters

When we understand that postpartum isn’t forever, we can approach it with more intention. Knowing it’s temporary:

1. Encourages Prioritising Care: Mothers are more likely to seek support, rest, and nourishment when they see this time as sacred and finite.
2. Reduces Overwhelm: Viewing postpartum as a chapter can alleviate fear and anxiety, helping mothers surrender to the process.
3. Encourages Perspective and Compassion:Recognising the changes that come with motherhood without feeling “stuck” in the postpartum identity allows mothers to release unrealistic expectations and allows for greater kindness and self-compassion.

Supporting Mothers Beyond Postpartum

Postpartum is just the beginning of the lifelong evolution of motherhood. While the postpartum period itself isn’t forever, the way we spend these sacred early weeks can shape the path ahead. In Traditional Chinese Medicine, it’s said that the way a mother spends her first 40 days can influence the next 40 years of her life.

The more we honour, surrender to, and embrace postpartum—prioritising deep rest, recovery, and nourishment—the better equipped we are to emerge from this chapter stronger and more supported. When we don’t give this time the care it deserves, we risk facing long-term implications, such as depletion or ongoing physical and emotional challenges.

At Village for Mama, we believe that investing in the postpartum period is an investment in your future. From nourishing recipes to practical resources, our mission is to help mothers feel cared for and supported as they navigate the early months of motherhood.